what is life exactly?

Random Acts of Kindness.

It was Friday, February 19, 1999. I was sitting in my car dazed, confused and very much in turmoil, because I had just buried my beloved two year old son, Jarod Charles, 15 minutes ago.

I had left in my car to get away and was completely numb to all around me. As I sat at the stop sign, I was so completely unaware that I started to proceed out of turn. The fellow across from me honked madly, gave me the “finger” and mouthed a few obscenities that I did not fail to miss.

I sat there so completely stunned and then I became so filled with spontaneous anger that I was shaking. I thought to myself, what a low life scum bag jerk to “flip me off” after I just buried my son. I peeled away and was simmering on the point of boil.

I drove back to the graveyard, have giving it enough time for the rest of the mourners to be gone, to have private time with my son. As I sat there, I became more upset that that man’s single act was crowding my mind when I just wanted to weep and talk to my little boy before my flight that night.

As I thought, I came to realize something that made me fill with shame instantly. WHO AM I TO BE ANGRY AT THAT MAN?? HOW WAS HE SUPPOSE TO KNOW?? In fact, I asked myself if I could still count on both hands or if it was time to start on my toes, how many times I had done that exact thing.

Then came the reality of it. And here is my point. It is about random acts of kindness, not random acts of unaware cruelty.

Like I said, how was he to know I had just buried my baby. But the sad thing is, how I am to know that the kid I cursed a punk about 2 months ago for nearly sideswiping me wasn’t on the brink of suicide and my gesture pushed him to the edge?

Or how about that little old man that I cursed until I even had to blush because he was not paying attention and missed the whole red light?? Or how about that lady that took MY PARKING spot at the mall?? How am I to know that the little old man wasn’t deep in memory of a loved one past….or how about the lady simply just didn’t see my blinker because she was worrying about getting her shopping done to get home to take care of her kids???

Ok, maybe I’m being overly dramatic, but really, its true…we know no one until we’ve walked in their shoes.

So please, the next time you feel anger, frustration, etc towards a stranger….think before you act. It’s the one think I like about life…it’s ok to be a hypocrite…one merely learns from their mistakes…or better said, past actions.

Instead, try to be overtly nice. For if they are truly in the wrong, perhaps your kind gesture will set them on a kinder, more aware approach. And please, tell someone you love them today….Life is very short….Live each minute like it is your last.

— Copyright © 1999 Nicole Dimberio — Nebraska

indeed. if you have not experienced it before, how would you know exactly what the person is feeling? i remember telling my friends that “you dont understand. you’ve not been through it”. to them, it hurts them to see me sad. they tried to help. i’m thankful. but i do tell them that sentence. because they do not understand my pain, they give me superficial comfort. it’s nice of them, yes, but still, aint the way i want it.
when i was in secondary school, i wanted to be a counsellor. but i always told myself, “if i want to be a counsellor, and be successful, i need to firstly, go through what my patient is going through. otherwise i’m unable to sympatise with her and give my heartfelt advice”. as a result, many people asked me, “if it’s suicide case, what are you going to do? try committing suicide once?” what they do not know is that, i’ve tried it. wasnt a serious case. but i’ve tried it. therefore, when people tell me that they have suicidal thoughts or they want to commit suicide, i’m able to counsel and advice them as though i’m the one feeling all the pain. and i’m thankful that these people, after listening to me, change for the better =)
you never know what you may do to a person to change his/her life. for all you know, you managed to encourage someone and steered him/her away from suicide! ^^

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